Leoni - Holistic Nursing Renewed my Passion

Leoni -







I went into nursing because I wanted to a midwife, so I started out being a childbirth educator. I received my nursing degree and became involved in home births. Then I found myself in the hospital pushing people through - I became disillusioned with my job. I didn’t feel the system provided much support for people birthing their babies, and I strongly considered leaving nursing.

When I was about ready to move on to something different, I discovered the concept of holistic nursing. I attended a holistic nursing workshop and found myself sitting with a hundred other nurses who shared similar visions as mine. Up to that point, I had lived a holistic lifestyle, but my lifestyle and my job were separate and the way I worked did not connect with the way I lived.

Suddenly, I saw a new way of nursing. Holistic nursing gave me an identity shift that renewed my passion for nursing. On the outside it didn’t look like I’d changed. I would still go to the hospital and take care of women in labor. The shift was inside of me and changed the way I perceived myself and what I was doing. I always believed that working with women in labor was valuable and it was something that was deeply part of who I was. But after what I call my “midlife crisis” and my quest towards holism, I was not embarrassed to be a nurse. Instead, I started honoring what I did.

In the early 1990s when I found the concept of holistic nursing, the American Holistic Nurses Association was gaining momentum. I took a very comprehensive certification course in holistic nursing.“The more present you are, the more you’re able to have your own heart open, the better you’re able to connect with your patient.” It was a very personal journey and I devoted a lot of time and energy for the three years it took me to complete. Once I graduated from the certification course, I submitted a portfolio to the AHNA to become a certified holistic nurse. About the time I was ready to apply to the AHNA for my certification, everybody was saying by the year 2000 all nurses would have to have a bachelor’s degree. At that point, the AHNA made it a requirement that as of the year 2000 you could no longer become a certified holistic nurse unless you had your bachelors.

Of course, all the associate degree nurses, including myself, were rushing to finish their certifications by the year 2000 so they could be grandfathered in. I wanted badly to be certified as a holistic nurse. I wanted it on my name badge. But I didn’t agree with the AHNA’s requirement. I was uncomfortable with it because it was becoming obvious the bachelor’s degree requirement for RNs was not going to happen. It also made me uncomfortable when I thought about an associate degree nurse walking up to me and asking me to talk about my holistic certification, and I would have to say, “You can’t be this anymore.” The third issue was ny belief that holism is inclusive and holistic. It’s saying that inherently, nurses are holistic, and so are the heart and the spirit of what we do. To me the organization that represented the concept of holistic nursing was saying, “You can’t be a holistic nurse unless you have your bachelors.” That struck me as the height of hypocrisy.

I had everything completed and ready to submit in December of 1999. Instead of submitting my portfolio, I wrote them a letter and said, “You’re wrong. I don’t agree with this policy. It strikes me as the height of hypocrisy that you’re talking about holism but you’re going to be exclusionary. I don’t buy it and I don’t want your certification. I’m a holistic nurse, period.” I felt I needed to stick to my principles, and to do this day I don’t have any regrets.

I see a lot of people who choose to get into nursing because they open the newspaper and see 20 want ads for nurses at $30.00 an hour. They know they can go anywhere and have a job and they have a perception that it’s a job that won’t be outsourced. But I also see those people burning out much faster. People really need to find something inside of them that gives them passion for what they do, instead of training for a job simply because it provides money and security. The nice thing about nursing is there are 1,001 different ways you can be a nurses, both with different work environments and different focuses. So somewhere you have to find the piece that is your passion; your dharma. I just precepted a PLU student and it was quite frustrating because she was just putting in the time. I don’t think birth was necessarily her thing. She was technically good, but she was disengaged from the patients. When it was her time to comfort, connect and calm a patient, she just wouldn’t do it. I tried to coach her but I don’t think I ever got through to her. It was disheartening.

Being present is the heart of nursing and the presence needs to be a reflection of whatever the patient and his or her circle of people needs. For some patients it might be the 3 C’s; comfort, care and calm. For someone else it might be giving information. For another patient it might be creating a safe place for them to be scared in. It’s being present for whatever is right in front of you.

There is a myth that by being present or opening your heart your energy is going to get sucked out of you. Part of what I teach in my workshops is the way energy and information moves in a circle. The more present you are, the more you’re able to have your own heart open, the better you’re able to connect with your patient. And the great news is it’s also the best way to walk out the door at the end of the day with your batteries full. It’s the opposite of the myth. Not being present and having our hearts closed costs us as individuals.

I’m a different nurse everyday, based on the connection I make with each individual patient. But at the end of every day, even if I’m on my feet for 12 hours and I’m physically tired, my heart and my spirit feel great. When someone asks me what I do, their eyes light up when I tell them, because my eyes light up when I talk about it. They didn’t used to. But now I’ve found a richness and honor in all I do.

Power Strategies: Passion, Presence, Dignity
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